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Monday, November 06, 2006

So Easy A Caveman Can Do It

That's the caption to a mock US Army poster over at Free Republic. Link via Rand Simberg post, which also links an About.com article on the US military's requirements regarding education and Armed Forces Vocational Aptitude Battery (ASVAB) scores.

In Rand's comments I had a little fun with an old novelty song by the Hollywood Argyles.

Theres a man in Iraqi that's world-renowned
(Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
He's stationed way out back in Karbala town
(Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
He dont eat nothin' but a MRE stew
(Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
Well this cat's name is-a Alley Oop
(Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)

He got a armored Humvee instead of dinosaw-ah
(Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
And he can shoot off your head before you count to faw-ah
(Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
He got M-16 rifle and a big ugly mort-ah
(Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
He go hunt for Baathist rebels and-a al-Qaeda
(Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)

(Alley Oop)
He's the toughest GI there is alive
(Alley Oop)
Wearin' clothes from a wildcat's hide
(Alley Oop)
He's the king of the desert jive
Look at that cave man go!

(One grammatical error - "Iraqi" should have been "Iraq." I challenge any caveman to do better.)

Update: Power Line has an image of a banner that appeared at the November 3 Army-Air Force football game. John Hinderaker writes, "It's reported that cadets on both sides cheered wildly."

Labels: Humor, Politics, Song Parodies

Posted by Alan at 2:40 PM |

Monday, September 26, 2005

Music To Blog By

(A slight rewording of the Firefly theme song)

Take my love, take my land
Take me where I cannot stand
I don't care, I'm still free
You can't take the Net from me

Take me to pajama-town
Tell MSM I won't back down
Fisk them all from sea to sea
You can't take the Net from me

There's no place I can't be
Since I found the blogospheeere
You can't take the Net from me

(Emperor Misha anticipates the upcoming Serenity movie.)

Update: It Comes In Pints plugs this post, with links to a couple of other Firefly/Serenity posts.

Update: I bet this parody would be banned in China - scroll up to the post right above this one for details.

Labels: Humor, Song Parodies

Posted by Alan at 8:15 PM |

Wednesday, December 18, 2002

Al Gore's Swan Song

Two years ago today the Electoral College representatives cast their votes in the 2000 election. Six days prior, the United States Supreme Court ruled 7-2 that the Florida Supreme Court's decision to continue the recounts in selected counties violated the Equal Protection clause of the 14th Amendment under the United States Constitution, and ruled 5-4 that recounts must adhere to the State of Florida's official deadline. (One has to wonder about the mindset of the two justices who concluded that recounts in Dade, Broward, Palm Beach, and Volusia counties violate the Constitution but musn't be stopped.)

In honor of this momentous occasion, I have a little ditty to the tune of "Lawyers, Guns, and Money" by Warren Zevon:

My Palm Beach supporters voted
The way I knew they'd do
But how was I to know
They voted for Buchanan, too

Went vote-counting in Dade and Broward
I took a little risk
Send lawyers, thugs and ballots
Judge, get me out of this

I'm the legitimate winner
But somehow I got stuck
By Kate Harris and the US Supreme Court
And I'm down on my luck
And I'm down on my luck
And I'm down on my luck

Now I'm hiding behind Dave Boies
I'm a desperate man
Send lawyers, thugs and ballots
The chads have hit the fan